The last few days have given our country a case of bad nerves. I don’t think you should shield your child from the world, but you definitely must give them a sense of security.
I understand the sense of nervousness we all feel and are expressing. I have gone to bed the last few nights with a sense of dread since the new administration took residence at Pennsylvania Avenue.
As a parent you want to instill in your children is a deep sense of security in themselves and the world. Here are two steps you need to instill immediately with.
#1 Build Trust
The first message of security your children ever feel is with you. feeling securely attached to you. Simply put, trust develops in children who learn that they can rely their parents to meet their physical and emotional needs. They will come to know when they come home they are safe. Even as adult, my home is my safe haven. I refuse chaos in my home. That means that social media time has limits. Turn off the phone at dinner time. Make sure that everyone spends time being present to each other. Let your child know that you will listen to what they have to say. Listen to them without interrupting. They have emotions and feelings and need to be acknowledged. They may say something that you find offensive or angers you. Listen. It was one of the gifts my parents gave me. They listened to me and trusted that I would listen to them and weight things fairly. It fosters communication.
#2 Be Consistent
When your children see you as consistent in your emotions, behavior, and reactions, you enable them to see you, relationships in general, and the world as predictable and, to a greater degree, controllable. Don’t underestimate the importance of consistency. When you set up a schedule with regular routine in it, your child will begin to understand structure. They will know there is a time and place for everything and will come to rely on that.
Take a deep breath and be present. Security is just that, it’s being present.
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